Last week I asked what song you’d sing on an American Idol audition, to which I received some great answers, including Skot’s CD-winning-worthy tune from Les Miserables (Hit me up for your choices, Skotty). This week, I think the question is easily as awesome… or even awesomer!

In light of the review I posted earlier today, I thought to myself,

Self, if you were a dope master of the ceremonies like Kevin “Kwalified” Ritchie, what would your name be?

A truly interesting question, I found myself with many options, some that were quite fly and others that would not fly at all. I mean, think of all the great names that my favorite MCs go by: Beefy, Mos Def, Pigeon John, Uno Mas, Blackthought, CookBook, MC Frontalot, thekeenone… but what to name myself?

First, I thought,

What about “MCJC”, I mean Justin Charles… JC… ah, I guess that sucks. Oh, I know, I could make it a play on one of my favorite MCs, like I could “Dos Mas” or even better yet “Whitethought”… no wait, that sounds like a white supremacist rapper, if there is such a thing.

I realized that as creative as I thought I was, I wasn’t. In fact, the name I chose was the easiest of all… and a name that my wife’s grandpop came up with to begin with… so here it is (stand in awe of my wit and wisdom!): “thepaintedman”.

HA! I am awesome. So, now it’s your turn. What would your rap name be?

My favorite answer gets a Hip Hop prizepack. Word?

Word.

No beating around the bush today, the winner of the RemixThis! SOLID GOLD contest is Austria’s Markus Schuechner, aka N-Jin. His remix won because it was thoroughly enjoyable and executed best. Not only will his track lead off this mixtape, but CookBook will be including this remix on one of his upcoming releases and sending him a T-shirt. Additionally, another N-Jin remix will close this 10 track mixtape (with a bonus download at the end of the post), so enjoy Markus’s genius.

Make sure to check the bottom of this post for some additional notes about the other entrants to this contest… there are consolation prizes.

1. CookBook – Solid Gold (N-Jin Remix) (El Ganador!)

2. The Langley Sisters – Strange to be in Love (VBM’s newest angelic voices from the UK)

3. thekeenone – Legal Drug Addict (Keen returns to the mix)

4. BenKenoB – SEPTA (MC Frontalot Mashup) (BenKenoB takes Frontalot vox and creates something new)

5. Alexander Lowery – Quartet for Guitars with Percussion in G Minor (aka “theone3rd” for Decap users)

6. Ed E. Ruger – Chillaxin’ (One of my fave tracks from Big Ed)

7. The Zero Four – You Don’t (Check out their website for more info)

8. CookBook – Solid Gold (Kwillis’s Rider Remix) (Killer remix, ineligible for the contest)

9. Manchild – Whadiddido (Mars Ill’s Manchild throws a phat track our way)

10. Sleep – Talk About It (N-Jin Remix) (Another PHAT N-Jin remix)

Other Contest Notes…

…as noted last night, the most original and creative remix was the remix done by Cassowaries. Very weird, very entertaining. CookBook said it may have been the winner if it weren’t for the fact that Cook couldn’t hear his own vocals and, just like TO, Cook like him some him. For being Mr. Original, you’ll be entitled to the first pick of the CD grab bag courtesy of your friendly neighborhood TPM.

…I really enjoyed BenKenoB’s Remix, but it wasn’t CookBook’s favorite. Another pretty original take on the song that warrants a free CD as a prize!

…Cook had great things to say about other remixes by The Nemesis, Frozenmammoth, and MC Dub. The Nemesis was “kinda weird, but in a good way”. Frozenmammoth’s second remix was “funky”. And, MC Dub had a “completely original take on the song” that Cook also noted as “moody”. All three of you will also receive free CD’s are a consolation, nothing special, but free is always fun.

Thanks to all and stay tuned for upcoming RemixThis! contests featuring Shael Riley and the85bears.

OH and here’s an AWESOME bonus, if you actually hung around long enough to get down to this line of the post… CLICK HERE FOR ALL REMIXES SUBMITTED TO THIS CONTEST IN ONE HUGE .ZIP FILE… Kwillis is not included in this .zip file, so don’t miss out on that download above.

Hey everyone, a few updates for ya’ll…

-The RemixThis! Contest is in full swing. In fact, RemixThis! “Solid Gold” featured on Remix Comps and Laptop Rockers. At least 4 entries are in, keep ‘em coming! Really hoping someone takes a shot at a rock version, mostly because I love me some Hip Hop injected with Rock and/or Roll! Do the damn thing… by Friday, that is.

-This week will conclude the Tuesday with Riley series. Hopefully that will be up on time this week, although with my schedule and his, I can’t promise anything. Check on Twitter and here to find out when it’s up.

-I am writing reviews and interviews for Decapolis now, check out reviews of Telegraph Canyon and Derek Webb. I will be rocking a review of TPM’s most downloaded band, the85bears, for Decap later this week.

-Those who are owed a digital prizepack for spreading the word of TPM on Twitter, never fear, I haven’t forgotten. Expect something via email this week!

-Later this week on TPM: Tunc Ak review, Sebastien Grainger review, K-Flay review, some tasting notes on Long Trail Harvest Ale, and some other surprises.

-Last but not least, I leave you all with a video to jam to. The last Song of the Day I picked was “The Pigeon John Song“, today I bring another Hip Hop track, this time by the god-pappy of Nerdcore. It’s MC Frontalot’s “Charity Case” off of 2005’s Nerdcore Rising. Without further ado, here’s “Charity Case” live at 2009’s Nerdapalooza:

…is my new favorite Nerdcore act. Period.

thepaintedman rates this:

Sorry Shael. Sorry Beefy. Sorry Lars. Sorry YT. Sorry Front. Sorry STD. These cats got it going on. Rock beats, catchy hooks, tons of great guests (see above list of apologies, in fact), clever lyrics, and something a bit different than most of the Nerdcore acts that I’ve been digging on, mainstream viability.

Admittedly, part of their allure is that Next Level is the first album loaded on my new iPod Touch… so they have an automatic leg up on everyone else I’ve ever reviewed. However, I have no doubt in my mind that this unfair advantage was unneeded for this great crew. Crew may be a bit of an overstatement, as Dual Core is a duo: Cincinnati, Ohio’s int80 and Manchester, England’s c64.

This duo is brand new to me, despite their 3 previous releases. While I cannot comment on these previous releases, I can state, without any question, that their latest release is nothing less than solid rockroll influenced hip-hop output. Nerds will surely find a lot here that they like and relate to, but the well crafted beats and commercial viability of their sound broadens their prospective audience greatly.

Kicking off with guitar driven rap-rock, the album progresses through 13 tracks of unique and different beats, all the while remaining a album with solid continuity. There aren’t too many tracks that standout to me as being the most impressive, mostly because the album performs so well as a whole.

If I were to choose a favorite track, it would be “Magnificent Seven”, just because it is a Nerdcore All-Star show. I am not sure I could even name everyone on the track… but I’ll give it a go: MC Lars, MC Frontalot, Beefy, Schaffer the Darklord, Mega Ran, and YTCracker… I’ll have to Dual Core how well I did on that one, because my iPod says “(featuring Nerdcore)”. Besides the track featuring everyone and their mothers, it also has a phat beat and makes me bop my head, which is usually a good thing.

Overall, I’m not exactly sure what to say about this album that hasn’t already been said on Beefy’s Amazon review of Next Level. This is my new favorite Nerdcore album and without question one of my new favorite hip-hop albums. If you are a fan of the Nerdcore guys, mainstream nerd rappers like Del tha Funkee Homosapien, or rock inspire hip-hop like Philly’s Roots crew, this is an album, you WILL be down with.

PS. How cool is it that I was able to download an App for my IPod that simulates a light saber when I swing it around?

thepaintedman rates this:

MC Lars already taught us all that Hot Topic is not punk rock, but I now want to tell you that Shael Riley is not Hip Hop. Then why include him on Hip Hop Week, you ask… simple, it’s because I said I was going to and I’m stubborn. Despite his pleas to be classified under beer because he believes he is “malty” like a “fresh Spaten Optimator” (which is a fantastic beer, by the way), I am sticking to my guns.

If you don’t know Shael Riley, you have been missing out. Wikipedia says that he is “a nerdcore hip-hop artist and guitarist currently residing in New York City, New York.” He’s worked with Beefy, Frontalot, Schäffer the Darklord, and Optimus Rhyme to name a few, so his Nerdcore credibility is certainly there… but now he proves once and for all, he’s not a rapper, but a musician and entertainer well versed in numerous styles of music. His claims that this album are not hip hop are 100% true, in fact the most prominent influence that I can hear is one of my favorite artists ever, Ben Folds. Lyrically and sonically, so much of Songs from the Pit reminds me of my favorite nerdy piano songsmith… there’s even a piano version of one of the songs on the release.

Now that you know Shael Riley is not simply hip hop and that I’m only reviewing him during Hip Hop Week because of my own stubbornness, let’s break down this pop rock release in more depth. First off, let’s talk packaging. Shael Riley and the Double Ice Backfire’s Songs from the Pit is a freakin’ CASSETTE TAPE. Remember those? Of course you don’t… well… cassette tapes were what most music was distributed on prior to the invention of compact discs, which have since been eliminated by digital music downloads. Thus, in order to listen to Shael and the gang, you need decade old technology… which of course if unassailably cool to any nerd like myself who thinks that going analog is a sign of being awesome.

Second, let’s talk music. This is a solid outing. I’ve read other reviews of this album that have described the album as “NES Rock” and I’m okay with that tag (the synth sounds and the lyrics make this assessment accurate), but all in all, the best assessment of this album is to describe it as a hook laden, pop oriented dork rock… or perhaps, we can just call it “malty”. Whatever we call it, here’s what I think about each track:

Track One: “Publishing Rights”

This track fits that “NES Rock” label. Straight out of 1985, Nintendo blips and bleeps can be throughout the track, augmenting the fantastic rock tune. Shael’s vocals are solid and Mark Schaffer (aka Schäffer the Darklord) lays down a phat verse. And… on top of this already being a great track, Mr. Riley promises a remix by his good friend Kasparov (a remix I hope to include on September’s Monthly Mixtape)

Track Two: “The Other Side of Memphis”

Here is where I begin to hear that Ben Folds type songwriting… while no piano graces the track, the keyboards are somewhat reminiscent of my favorite singer/songwriter. What is much more Folds-esque in the track is the song structure and lyrical quality. I’d expect that other fans of Ben would agree that this is a fantastic song.

Track Three: “How to Fire a Gun”

Riley’s vocals stand out as my favorite element of this track, although the bass lines are quite awesome, as well. And the idea of writing a 2D video game that is based off GPS technology is a great idea that someone needs to work on.

Track Four: “Asian Kids Have All the Best Moves”

What is there to say? The title of the track alone makes this a great track because of how true it is. This is another track that screams Ben Folds to me, especially the vocal delivery. This may be my favorite track, although it is difficult to decide, because I like the entire cassette.

Track Five: “Hipster Hoax”

A fun, dancey pop song… kind of makes me think of a Panic! at the Disco song without the punk influence (or at least less of a punk influence). If you dig on the dancey synthesizer pop rock of bands like Cobra Starship, this is a track you’d dig on. There is a rad breakdown on the bridge. Overall, maybe the most fun (original) song on the tape.

Track Six: “Chinese Ninja Warrior”

The reason “Hipster Hoax is only the most fun original track and not the most fun overall track is that Riley and his band cover “Subzero (Chinese Ninja Warrior)” by The Immortals. It’s awesome… they took a cheesy, hilarious song about Mortal Kombat’s Subzero and made it sound like a semi-serious indie rock song. The synth and the high pitched wails of “freezing vibrations” are what keeps it from being a strictly serious cover and make sure to keep the lighthearted nature in tact.

Track Seven: “tip eht fo mottob”

The beat on this one is the closest thing to Hip Hop on the cassette. This is an awesome track. Kinda makes me think of Suzanne Vega’s “Tom’s Diner” in sound… though I’m not exactly sure why.

Track Eight: “Asian Kids Have All the Best Moves (Piano Version)”

Piano version of track 4… if I didn’t already make the Ben Folds comparison, then here is where it’s all too obvious. Another track in the running for my favorite on the tape. Vocals shine in this stripped down alternate take!

So overall, I dig Shael Riley’s newest venture. In fact, dare I say, “It’s MALTY!”

thepaintedman rates this:

MC Lars’s most recent release, This Gigantic Robot Kills is a thoroughly enjoyable LP. Nerdcore rap laid on top of all different styles of music, the album is primarily just chock full of fun. This is with the exception of the only very serious track, “Twenty Three”, a sad tune about the suicide of one of Lars’s friends. Every track here is solid and there are tons of guest, from Nerdcore staples like Frontalot to rock musicians like Gabe Saporta of Cobra Starship to nerd pioneer Weird Al. There is even a cover of Atom & His Package’s “Using the Metric System”.

The title of the album is an homage to Wesley Willis, which in and of itself makes the album undeniably awesome, but what’s even cooler is how little Lars cares about conforming to any mold. He’s hip-hop, punk rock, ska-core, dance pop, rock’n’roll, and electronica all at once. He just is what he wants to be, which is refreshing in a world where everyone wants to be someone else. From sampling Fugazi to writing songs about Shakespeare, nothing is off limits.

It’s hard to review the album in any one way. A track by track breakdown would be a bit excessive, while the overall sound can’t be described without doing so. The method I chose was to pick out my three favorite tracks and talk about them, specifically.

“True Player for Real” is the second track on the album and the first full track, as the opener is only about a minute long. With Weird Al on accordion and Wheatus as the backing band, the track has a fun, full sound. With a quote from Wesley Willis starting the track off, Lars heads right into his “post-punk” rhymes and his matter of fact chorus where he calls himself a “TPFR” then explains that it means “True Player for Real”. He drops names of hip-hop pioneers right along side references to wikipedia and Ralph Waldo Emerson. You even know when the key is going to change in the track because he calls out “Key Change” before it does.

“Twenty Three” is the only song that isn’t totally tongue-in-cheek. In fact, it hits a nerve, especially when juxtaposed with tracks that are nothing but fun and happy. Lars laments the loss of a friend to depression and suicide, with a chorus that notes the subject of the song will always be 23, rather than growing old with Lars and friends. I thank God I haven’t lost any close friends to suicide, but I can’t help but feel the sadness of this well crafted cautionary tale of his friend Patrick and his inability to cope with life’s pain and struggles.

“(Lord It’s Hard to be Happy When You’re Not) Using the Metric System” is a cover of one of my favorite tracks by my favorite short, chubby Jew from Philly. Atom & His Package was an integral piece in the high school experience of myself and many of my friends, as we spent much time enjoying his concerts at local firehalls in North Jersey. Lars performs the track in true Atom fashion, while still making it his own.

There are numerous other great tracks, in fact I like just about every one, but these are a few of the best. I promise that most people reading this will find something they lick here, unless they are against listening to music that induces smiles… and if that’s the case they should go back to listening to sad bastard music and stop wasting their time on this website, as they are unlikely to find anything here that they enjoy.

Pictured below is Beefy w/ his buddies in Optimus Rhyme. Who is Beefy? Let’s find out.

Beefy? What’s up with the name?

I’m a big guy. Someone was trying to make fun of me on a message board once and called me MC Beefy Bee and I liked the Beefy part, so I used it. Then it just kinda morphed into Beef Thompson over the years. I likes it. How about you?

I appreciate that, I am also quite a large fellow… So, besides your name, tell the readers a little bit about you.

I’m a nerdcore hip-hop artist from Southeast Washington. I’m very much into my Xbox and iPhone and have been a comic book nerd for years. I’ve put out 2 full albums and a bunch of free EPs that you can get at my website and I’ve done shows with people like MC Lars and YTCracker in Seattle, Portland, and even Amsterdam. I’m also very sexy. Don’t deny me. You’ll just look foolish.

I have a couple of your albums, personally my favorite song is your cover of Frontalot’s “Nerdcore Hip-Hop”… not sure why exactly, I just dig it a lot. In fact, I like it a lot more than the original. Is Frontalot an influence on you, who else in the Nerdcore scene do you consider an influence on what you do?

Front is definitely an influence. I can’t write like him at all, but he’s cleaver with his concepts and is an amazing performer. I look up to the big acts in Nerdcore like Lars, mc chris, and YTCracker. I’m also a fan SJ the Wordburglar for his wordplay and punchlines. My favorite band and biggest influence is Optimus Rhyme, a Nerdcore Seattle act that sadly broke up recently. It sucks. Hard.

Nerdcore aside, who are some you you favorite hip hop artists?

I grew up on Notorious BIG and Jay-Z so that was my base. I’m a big fan of the first few Gym Class Heroes albums before it got really radio-friendly. Big fan of Lupe Fiasco and early Kanye West and Eminem. That’s honestly about it.

How about other music?

I’m a White Stripes fan. I don’t know if it makes me less manly but I dig Regina Spektor. Tenacious D is the greatest band in the world, but everyone already knows that. I’ve listened to Sublime’s 40oz to Freedom a million times and was in love with the first Gnarls Barkley album. I don’t know if that last one counts as hip-hop or not though.

Good stuff, Sublime is likely my favorite band of all-time and that is their best album, hands down. On the topic of other musical styles, what type of music is the scariest? I just re-read Lords of Chaos, about the Black Metal scene, but I find myself still most afraid of most Country music.

I don’t like music that seems like it’s pissed off at me. I don’t want my music to scream at me. I don’t get that whole scene. If it works for some people that’s cool, just not my cup of tea. I don’t know if I’m really afraid of it since it’s all just a big act when their on stage. I think balls deep Christian music scares me the most. Those people really really believe.

Christian music can indeed be a bit frightening. So let’s move beyond music for a minute, shall we? As a Nerdcore artist, I thinks it’s safe to assume that you are a self-proclaimed nerd (as am I). What are your nerdiest traits and tendencies?

Like a lot of nerds I can carry entire conversations using nothing but movie and TV quotes. It’s like speaking a different language. Besides that I don’t think there’s really one particular thing that is my nerdiest quality. I have a <3 and a Bullet Bill tattoo, so I'm clearly hardcore. Oh, I know, I've made albums worth of songs about things like Street Fighter and board games. That's pretty nerdy.

I actually got a Star Wars Father’s Day card from my 7th month old son, how awesome is that? You have any kids?

My girlfriend has a year and a half old daughter we call Nugget and she gave me a Batman chocolate box for Valentine’s Day. It might have been the greatest day ever. I’ve been involved with the little one since she was 5 months old so I get all the joys of changing diapers and cleaning up after her but lack the ability to make decisions or call her a daughter, so it sucks a little but I loves her so I allow it.

That’s really cool, great V-Day gift… so back to music… or rather, hip hop feuds. I believe the reason Nerdcore isn’t more prominent in the national scene is that there are no publicizedhardcore beefs and feuds like in every other sub-genre of hip hop. I am requesting that you start one now, by dropping me a short freestyle about a Nerdcore artist of your choice.

How out of the loop you are sir. Nerdcore started with nothing but beefs and fighting. I should know because it seems like I started 90% of them. It’s actually just finally calmed down. And I already made a diss song called “Diss Missed” that was on my Private Dick EP. People dug it. Not so much the people dissed in the song though.

Well, I guess I’m a late bloom in the Nerdcore scene… care to start a feud with me?

Fuck you. I hate you! Feud Status: IT’S ON!

Well, that’s just too much for me sir! This interview is over! By the way, take care and keep in touch.

I change my mind. I love you. Let’s be BFFs. Feud Status: BFFs!

thepaintedman rates this:

wikipedia describes YTCracker as:

Bryce Case, Jr. (b. August 23, 1982), otherwise known as YTCracker (pronounced “whitey cracker”), is a former cracker most known for defacing the webpages of several federal and municipal government websites in the United States, as well as several in private industry at the age of 17. Case later became known for his work as a Nerdcore hip hop artist.

It goes on to explain that he began programming in BASIC at the age of 4 (I began at age 5 or 6, so I guess he has me beat). Apparently, YTCracker went on to gain notoriety as a hacker, then turned his efforts to becoming a nerd rapper.

While I have been a nerd throughout my entire life (or at least since I was 5 or 6 and started programming on Color BASIC on my Tandy), I only discovered my love for nerdcore hip-hop in the past few months. Having gotten into “Fett’s Vette” by mc chris a few years ago, I only dove more into the rest of the scene recently… from chris, I went to Frontalot, then MC Hawking, then Lars, and from picking up a copy of The Digital Gangster EP, I found out about YTCracker. And thank the Lord that I did discover him, even if it was several years late.

Nerdcore Entertainment System is a free download on YTCracker.com and I promptly downloaded it on my first visit to the site. Since that time, I have been bumping to old school NES song with clever nerdy rhymes and some fresh beats thrown in for good measure. If you are unfamiliar with the album, what I am saying is that YTCracker took original NES theme songs from games like The Legend of Zelda, Double Dragon, and Megaman, threw in some good drumbeats, and proceeded to rap about all things nerd! It’s fantastic.

In the first full track, “Meganerd”, he raps about the life of a “meganerd” and how they rule the world. In “Surgerunner”, he laments about his need for Surge to get his energy, calling it his “hocus pocus focus juice.” In “Legend”, he talks about how great he is on top of the Zelda theme:

I’m a legend everywhere that I go, every distro
Every Craigslist ho pumping they fist yo
Can’t get enough of YTCracker’s jams and they
Can’t get enough of YTCracker’s spam

Every track has a flair its own, and YTCracker proves that he can spit with the best of them. A cool concept and a fun album, well worth its price of free).

If you are still spinning Jay-Z and Jadakiss, it’s time to wake up and check out the revolution… YTCracker, MC Frontalot, mc chris, and MC Larrs are where it’s at now. Just think, if Tupac had “Nerd Life” tatted on his stomach rather than “Thug Life”, he’d probably still be alive.