Worst. Movie. Ever

June 3rd, 2009

thepaintedman rates this: ★★½☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

freddy-got-fingered_flr

I know, I know. Giving this movie two and a half stars is, indeed, a bit high. However, there is a bit of nostalgia and sentimentality involved in that… subtract those extra points and the few hilarious quotes, and then I’d imagine that this movie would be rated about half a star. Point blank: Freddy Got Fingered sucked.

The basic plot, for those who are not familiar with this 2001 film, is as follows: Gord, Tom’s Green’s character, leaves home in his Le Baron to go become an animator. After failing, he returns home, fights with his father (Rip Torn) and tells the psychiatrist that his father fingers his younger brother, Freddy (played by the guy who plays Finch in American Pie). Freddy gets put in a home for abused kids, Gord’s mom leaves his dad, and Gord gets BJs from a nympho paraplegic. Eventually, he sells his cartoon to Dave Davidson for one million dollars, then spends it on ridiculous crap.

Seriously, this movie is God-awful. The saddest part of it all is that I am watching it right now. It’s the longest 80 minutes of all-time and there is very little in the way of anything worthwhile in the film. Did I mention how much the film makes me cringe?

deerdance

At least there are some good quotes: “My hooves! Listen to my hooves!”